Two of the best films that I watched in the cinema last year were Lawless (Tom Hardy’s presence may or may not have affected my judgement haha, no but honestly brilliant film in my opinion, and Savages. This blog is about the latter film.
I think the thing that most struck people about the movie Savages was the dynamic set up of the relationship between the 3 protagonists; Chon (Taylor Kitsch), O (Blake Lively) and Ben (Aaron Johnson). Chon and Ben are best friends and they share O as a girlfriend. I’ll admit, at first, even I was sceptical of the believability of such a romantic arrangement, but perhaps my scepticism lay in the fact that I was particularly a fan of the choice of casting of Blake Lively. Anywhoo, as the film progressed I actually came to see that their relationship was actually quite beautiful in that they all loved each other equally and had a very intense and passionate relationship. And so I ask you this…why don’t such relationships exist in our society?
One of my favourite lyrics is “I believe that marriage isn’t between man and woman but between love and love” by Frank Ocean in his song ‘We All Try’. Frank publically came out as homosexual last year by releasing a letter he had written and I have previously blogged about the strength and beauty of that letter. How does this relate to Savages you ask? Well, what I’d like to know is who’s to say that love should be confined to norms?Why must only ‘traditional’ relationships exist and surely as we evolve and progress as humans, should we not adapt and more importantly, ACCEPT others and their relationships? For example, homosexuals and their choice to start a family and what a wonderful thing that is (in my opinion). Some of you may disagree, personally I’m incredibly open minded when it comes to most things and I whole heartedly believe in love and the joy it can provide, despite your sexuality. I’ve recently started watching a new TV show called ‘The New Normal’ and I completely advocate it’s message. But that’s a topic for another day as I seem to have got side tracked here.
Essentially, what I’m trying to say, or to ask, is would you be comfortable being in a relationship with more than one person as long as the other person knew about it and were comfortable with it? And if not, why? Why is it that we feel possessive over our partners? Is it a case of ‘I chose you so now you are mine and mine alone’? Surely if we removed the betrayal aspect of being with more than one person, would we not be more accepting of it?Please don’t misunderstand this blog, this is not an attack against monogamy, it is simply a query into whether, as a society, we do feel we have freedom of choice? If you turned up at a social gathering or even a work do and said to your boss “meet my boyfriends alex and sam” would you feel you were being judged for having that lifestyle choice? Perhaps it’s not so much that we don’t have the opportunity to have such relationships then, perhaps it’s more that we care too much what people think and would fear being ridiculed?
Finally, something to consider is whether men or women would be more comfortable with this type of arrangement?Who out of the two genders is the more possessive? In the movie, the two best friends did make the odd snide comments to one another when they knew the other had been fornicating with ‘O’, but they seemed to be simply in jest. Would women be as comfortable sharing one man? You could argue as the more insecure of the two genders perhaps not, perhaps their jealousy would take over and they wouldn’t able to appreciate the relationship for what it was; an expression of love between 3 individuals.
I think something else that inspired this blog, wasn’t just me recalling the movie Savages, it wasn’t just me watching ‘The New Normal’ but it was also the fact that I’ve been filling in a lot of job applications recently. Now there is always an ‘Equal Opportunities’ section which asks you about your ethnic origin, religion, whether you have a disability and your sexual orientation. Other than the disability question, I’m not really quite sure whether I understand the purpose of this section. Surely my sexual orientation, ethnicity and religion should have no impact whatsoever on my ability to do the job? So why do they ask? I mean isn’t the fact that they’re asking contradictory of the fact that whatever I choose should be seen as ‘equal’? Perhaps I’m just being pedantic now but whereas at first it was simply something I was accustomed to filling in, after about the first 5 I started to question it’s actual importance? Perhaps I should just start filling in all the fields as ‘prefer not to specify’, although will they then question my choice in that?Hmm..I do overthink things don’t I haha.
Right, I’ll end it there, please feel free to comment and let me know your opinions 🙂
Thanks for reading and oh, go watch Savages! If you like your gang/drug crime thrillers then this one’s for you! Also, Aaron Johnson’s pretty easy on the eyes lol